This week, we’re doing a deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many occasions on this present—the e-book The 12 Week Year. So if you’re within the temper to speak about objective setting, then this episode is for you!
Plus, we’re going to speak concerning the High Five Test.
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Present Notes
Why a 12-week objective is best:
-Lengthy deadlines can really feel very daunting and result in procrastination.
-You’ll be able to break up your objectives into seasons so that you do extra work on them when you will have extra time and fewer if you end up busier.
The essential components of the 12-week yr:
-Making your imaginative and prescient (be certain that it’s clear and measurable).
-Develop your plan (break up your objective right into a collection of small objectives).
-Accountability and retaining rating
-Checking in
Elsie’s prime 5 strengths:
-Catalyst
-Optimist
-Philomath
-Thinker
-Timekeeper
Emma’s prime 5 strengths:
-Philomath
-Timekeeper
-Focus Knowledgeable
-Deliverer
-Thinker
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Episode 173 Transcript:
Emma: You’re listening to The Lovely Mess Podcast, your cozy consolation pay attention. This week we’re doing one other deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many occasions on this present. It’s the e-book, the 12 Week 12 months. So in case you’re within the temper to speak about objective setting, this episode is for you. And we’re additionally gonna speak a bit bit concerning the Excessive 5 check, which we’re gonna speak about our outcomes, Elsie’s outcomes, my outcomes, and how one can take the check in case you’re .
Elsie: I’ll clarify the general idea of the 12 Week 12 months. So the 12 week yr is a objective setting methodology that goes by quarter. So 12 weeks is one quarter, proper?
Emma: Yeah, it’s three months.
Elsie: Yeah. So 12 weeks is each three months. The factor I really like about that is while you set your objectives only for the brand new yr, the start of every yr. To begin with, it may be like a procrastination factor the place you don’t have an excellent stable January, that type of occurs to me yearly. You’re like, I didn’t actually obtain my objective in January, so I suppose I’m simply not going to have an ideal yr this yr.
Emma: So I suppose I’ll simply wait, quit for subsequent January.
Elsie: Proper. So while you do it each three months, you simply have 4 occasions the recent begins, 4 occasions extra recent begins than you do annually, which I really like. And the opposite factor is that the majority objectives that you just need to obtain in a yr, you truly might obtain or make main headway in simply three months. You don’t actually need a yr for many objectives, and even in case you do want a yr, you possibly can not less than do one a part of your objective then do the subsequent half. Part them off in your subsequent quarter? I believe that the twelfth week yr was actually, actually useful for me, it’s only a mindset shift. And I really like New 12 months’s objectives personally. I’m not a kind of individuals who’s like, I’m not a decision particular person. I’m undoubtedly a decision particular person. I’ll at all times take an opportunity to set a objective. . However I believe that that is simply extra sensible and it really works higher. And the opposite factor that they do so much within the 12 week yr is behavior monitoring. So there’s a whole lot of journaling and a whole lot of like monitoring of your progress. And that’s one thing that works actually good for my persona as a result of I type of a bit little bit of a perfectionist factor the place if I don’t do one thing day by day, then I really feel like that I’ve already failed. And with the ability to see that doing one thing three to 5 occasions per week is in some methods higher as a result of it’s like attainable as an alternative of inconceivable, and it’s simply nearly as good as doing one thing day by day. I believe that having requirements that you could by no means obtain might be one of many greatest enemies of success that many people have. Yeah, I discovered the e-book. When you haven’t learn it, I’d undoubtedly advocate it, however you possibly can most likely additionally simply take heed to this episode and take like the principle excessive factors from it as a result of it’s fairly easy.
Emma: Yeah, it’s fairly easy. And it’s not a protracted e-book too. So the 12 week yr has like a web site the place you can even join a publication and I’ve signed up for it years and years in the past. It’s type of a kind of newsletters the place they’ll ship like suggestions and methods right here and there or type of like check-ins, issues like that. So anyway, I prefer it. If I don’t have time, I don’t learn ’em. But when I’ve time and I do learn them, I normally discover them like useful. So anyway, when you’ve got any curiosity in that, simply so you realize that’s out there, it’s free. Okay. So I used to be simply gonna go forward and go over a couple of issues which might be type of just like the case for a brief deadline , as a result of that’s just about it. Is the 12 week years like, Hey, let’s have shorter deadlines as an alternative of this yr lengthy deadline. Sure, and I believe so many of those you type of already hit on together with your synopsis of the 12 week yr, and I believe that’s type of fascinating. So I’ll undergo these type of rapidly, however be at liberty to elaborate if you wish to, however yeah. Okay, so lengthy deadlines can actually simply result in a whole lot of procrastination. If you realize you will have a complete yr to do one thing and possibly you don’t actually need a yr to do it, then you definately’ll find yourself procrastinating. So you find yourself being like, oh, I’ll get to it, after which come October you’re like, oh crap, I higher actually work on this objective as a result of I’m all through the yr and you could possibly have simply completed it rapidly after which moved on to your subsequent factor. Additionally, I believe lengthy deadlines can generally imply that our priorities or our life actually modifications, and I don’t learn about you, however that’s the place I get actually hung up, is that if I’ve made a objective after which my life actually does change and it makes extra sense for me to vary that objective. Generally I get it in my head that I’m giving up or I failed, or I’m making an excuse to not end my objective when the reality is that this objective simply doesn’t serve me anymore as a result of I made it six months in the past and my life was totally different six months in the past.
Elsie: I’ve this drawback actually unhealthy, with the ability to settle for placing a pause button on objectives has been very helpful for me. Earlier than that, I actually had the mindset that if I wasn’t doing every thing proper now, like if somebody says, how’s your pottery going? Proper now, I haven’t made pottery for greater than a month, I’d really feel like panicked in like a failure. However now, that I’ve my pause button in place and I do know that like we’re displaying our home completely continuously and that’s why I can’t get my pottery stuff out as a lot as I wished to, I used to be leaving it out for months at a time. It’s simply not my productive season for that proper now and will probably be once more sooner or later. There’s a whole lot of good thoughts stuff, extra mindset stuff on this e-book, particularly for individuals who might be like very onerous on your self or like an all or nothing persona.
Emma: Yeah, I believe that it’s a whole lot of mindset modifications and actually optimistic ones usually. As a result of, yeah, there’s simply a whole lot of guilt that may come into objective setting and I actually suppose that isn’t useful, so discovering methods to do away with that’s actually good. Okay, so one other factor, lengthy deadlines may also really feel actually daunting. So in case you actually do make a objective that’s gonna take you a yr to perform it, it’s most likely a extremely huge objective. Except you break it down into small objectives, you’re most likely gonna really feel overwhelmed, and that may even result in you giving up. So alongside these strains, I believe lengthy deadlines, once they’re completed efficiently, they actually simply are a collection of quick deadlines. When you’re your objective is, like Elsie loves pottery, I’m making an attempt to write down a e-book. So if I’m like, my objective is to write down a e-book, it’s like, okay, properly the first step is like define, step two, chapter one, you realize, nevertheless many chapters, it’s a collection of small objectives alongside the way in which. And so I believe the 12 week yr in some methods is simply an acknowledgement that with the intention to accomplish one thing huge in a yr or 5 years or no matter, you’re on the deadline. You’re simply gonna have a bunch of small objectives alongside the way in which, and so that you may as properly simply consider it as, okay, properly what’s my 12 week plan right here as a result of I obtained three months to do X, Y, Z. So this type of ties into all of it, however I like quarterly objectives partially as a result of I believe, and I particularly suppose this for our work, there’s simply totally different components of the yr. Perhaps it’s as a result of I dwell someplace with the 4 Seasons, possibly it’s as a result of I’ve a child, and so like college and daycare might be totally different at totally different occasions and there’s holidays. I don’t know. However for me, I really feel like I can actually go loopy for work in Q1 and Q2 after which Q3 and this fall there’s, there’s a whole lot of work, however there’s much more like household time and holidays and issues like that. And I like with the ability to type of consider issues in that manner. So then I don’t really feel unhealthy in let’s say this fall, I’m not working fairly as a lot cuz I’ve a whole lot of vacation stuff going if I type of knew that and I actually busted my in Q1 and q2, now I’m like, oh, I’m on monitor. You realize, my objectives in This autumn will not be as profession, they’re extra household cleansing the home, preparing for friends, no matter, they’re extra in that vary. And I can have that 12 weeks be one thing that is sensible for my yr versus this yr lengthy objective that has to embody all these totally different seasons, and it nearly doesn’t make sence.
Elsie: I believe that in This autumn for our enterprise, we type of do have to enter survival mode yearly as a result of it’s normally once we do nearly all of our advertisements, so that you don’t get to choose your content material as a lot as you do that time of yr. Yeah, I utterly agree, which is like advertisements and household stuff.
Emma: Yeah. You’re like, what’s do and what’s happening with my household? That’s all I’ve time for. You realize, it’s enjoyable, nevertheless it’s a sure season and I believe in case you’re anticipating to do a whole lot of deep work for the longer term, you’re simply not gonna get to do it that quarter, I by no means do. So anyway, that’s what Q1’s for. So these are type of my case for the quick deadline, so hopefully we’ve swayed you. I really feel like we most likely did.
Elsie: I believe everyone seems to be swayed, I undoubtedly am, I’d by no means return. I believe that it’s very compelling. There’s actually nothing that’s higher about lengthy deadlines. No, there’s actually nothing.
Emma: No. Yeah, it’s a great methodology. I agree.
Elsie: Case’s closed.
Emma: Case’s closed, so everyone’s on board, good. Okay, so then I simply wished to speak about, to me the essential components of the 12 week yr, some issues he hits on within the e-book and issues that may make it easier to achieve success as you’re making your objectives for the subsequent 12 weeks. Okay, so the primary one is making your imaginative and prescient. How do you resolve what to work on? How do you resolve what objectives you need? Okay, so I believe some issues that assistance is now that you realize that you’ve got 12 weeks you is usually a little extra life like about what you will get completed in 12 weeks. So that you’re not essentially going to be making a objective that’s like, I’m going to learn 80 books and go to the gymnasium 100 occasions or no matter.You simply know that that’s not gonna occur in 12 weeks. So now you possibly can focus a bit extra on what’s life like to occur in these 12 weeks. And I’d additionally say as you’re making your imaginative and prescient, your objectives, I love to do them in a bunch of various areas. So I wish to type of have totally different buckets of like, right here’s my private life, which incorporates like hobbies and self care. And generally additionally like well being and wellness stuff, like going to the gymnasium or no matter. Then I consider household, which is usually stuff with my son, nevertheless it’s different issues too. And I type of put buddies in there too, so if a pal’s having a birthday or if a pal’s going by a tough time, I wanna make time to be there for them or do one thing, and I take into consideration profession. So what am I making an attempt to perform these subsequent 12 weeks at work. Is there one thing that we’re constructing? Is there some type of huge deadline? Is there one thing that I’ve been wanting to start out and end? Or not less than begin, you realize, once more, you solely have 12 weeks. So what are we getting completed in these 12 weeks, that type of. So I wish to have totally different buckets that’s how I give it some thought. However one thing that I believe is admittedly essential while you’re making objectives is to make it possible for it’s clear and measurable. I believe in case you’re like, okay, on the finish of those 12 weeks, let’s say you’re engaged on some psychological well being stuff, you’ve had a tough time and also you’re making an attempt to work on that. Not that that’s essentially me, precisely and I’m simply utilizing myself right here’s an instance, let’s simply say. So in case you make the objective, I simply wanna really feel higher in 12 weeks. It’s like, properly, Good objective not precisely very clear. Not precisely very measurable but. What do you actually imply by that? And if it’s like, properly, I wanna really feel higher, I wanna have much less days the place I’m feeling actually down. I need to really feel extra hopeful. So attempt to outline it a bit bit extra, after which take into consideration what are some issues that you could possibly measure in that as a result of measuring a sense is admittedly onerous, that may be very tough. However as an alternative take into consideration like, I need to be certain that I am going to remedy each month. Okay, so then you definately’re gonna go to remedy 3 times within the subsequent 12 weeks, okay? That’s measurable. Nice, you could possibly do this. I need to spend extra time with buddies. I need to get some sunshine. I need to work on endorphin stuff. So possibly that’s, I’m gonna do some cardio, I’m gonna go to the gymnasium. I’m gonna begin operating no matter factor that you just suppose is gonna assist. That is your objectives, however make them measurable issues that you could truly know in case you achieved it or not, in case you did it or not. As a result of while you get to the top of the 12 weeks, you’re gonna take inventory. You’re gonna say, oh, did I make it? Did I get all of the issues completed? And it’s not that you just’re making an attempt to make this huge to-do record and simply undergo the motions. But when issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it is likely to be actually onerous to know in case your like, in case you get to the top of the 12 weeks and also you’re like, I don’t really feel higher, then you definately’re gonna wanna know why. So is it that you just did all of the issues and people didn’t assist and now you’ve gotta strive one thing else? Or is it that you just didn’t do the issues, you bought sidetracked, you bought distracted, possibly one thing occurred the place you couldn’t, one thing main modified in your life, that occurs. But when it issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it’s gonna be actually onerous to know why it labored or didn’t work. Okay, in order that’s type of about making your imaginative and prescient. Then the subsequent is when you type of have your imaginative and prescient, develop your plan. So break up your objective right into a collection of small objectives, so issues for every month and even every week. And I believe while you’re occupied with 12 weeks, that is a lot simpler than while you’re occupied with a complete yr as a result of generally I’ll make a large record that’s for the entire yr. Elsie and I do that so much for weblog posts, we’re like, right here’s a thousand weblog posts I wanna write as a result of we simply get enthusiastic about concepts. So we at all times have manner too many concepts and I like to make a giant record like that. I believe it’s actually enjoyable, it makes me really feel excited. It makes me really feel like the longer term’s stuffed with potentialities. So I believe that’s a great train for these causes. Nevertheless it comes to really executing, so this week for instance, I’m sick. So I had someday the place I used to be mainly off cuz I used to be simply actually sick and couldn’t actually work. So then it’s like, okay, I’m gonna take a look at my record and I now have these hundreds of concepts and solely 4 days to work, what might I get completed? Whereas as an alternative, in case you had these 5 issues to do that week, is there one which you should take off the record since you have been sick. Then you definitely simply get to maintain transferring ahead and it simply makes it so much sooner and simpler to comply with if you realize the place you’re going after which you can also make faster changes versus this big, big grasp plan and also you get a barely off track and now you’re tremendous off track.
Elsie: Yeah, I agree. I believe this can be a little little bit of a great time to say my post-it methodology. Oh by the way in which, Podcast listeners attempt to diagnose me with h ADHD type of so much. I’m like, I do know that I most likely have ADHD so lI get it. Most likely lots of people have undiagnosed ADHD. So when you’ve got any hassle with focusing, I believe the massive record, like my weblog submit record for the yr of what I wanna do, it’s stapled collectively, it’s three pages of typed textual content it like it isn’t one thing that I would like to have a look at each week. So for me to have a look at a small record of about 5 issues, like sufficiently small to suit on a post-it is what my mind can deal with after which I can select one thing to really work on. So I believe that in case you’re an individual who will get simply overwhelmed by a protracted record, simply don’t take a look at the lengthy record that usually. Each few weeks you possibly can go in and choose some issues from it and preserve your self on a small record. I believe it’s only a trick you are able to do on your self that actually works.
Emma: Sure, I agree and I believe too, it simply makes it the place everyone’s busy. All of us have limitations in our life, regardless of for what cause. And I believe that for instance, after I’m writing a e-book, as soon as I’ve the define, I instantly really feel manner much less overwhelmed as a result of if I’ve two and a half to a few hours the place I can work on this at present, that’s all I’ve. I’m not gonna get to work on it extra possibly this complete week,however then I take a look at my define and I’m like, oh, chapter 4 I really feel like I actually have a deal with on that. I’m gonna write that proper now, and I do it after which it’s completed. And it’s like that’s one thing that now simply moved my complete undertaking ahead in a significant manner. Did I end the entire e-book? No, however did I write a chapter? Sure I did within the time that I’ve. And so, and that’s, , you realize, kind of it’s like making an attempt to interrupt down these huge issues that we wanna do in life into smaller chew dimension issues in order that we are able to truly get them completed. As a result of life is filled with a lot of different issues which might be by no means gonna be on our record, however we nonetheless must do them, and that’s simply what life’s like and it’s okay. Okay, so develop your plan and that can assist, break down your objective into very small objectives. They are often weekly, month-to-month, they will even be every day. I’d say too, don’t really feel like they must be so inflexible as a result of I believe in case you do have a really, like each single day this should occur. That doesn’t go away you a lot area for getting sick, or in case your child will get sick or you will have a snow day or the web goes out at your own home and you may’t work on the factor you have been gonna work on. It’s important to go away some margin to let life occur, otherwise you’re actually gonna stress your self out, so do this too.
Elsie: Yeah, give attention to the massive wins for certain. So long as I can get this a part of my record completed, then the remainder of it’s non-obligatory. I believe is an effective manner to consider it.
Emma: Okay, after which the subsequent factor I wanna speak about I believe varies a lot from individual to individual. So it’s accountability and retaining rating. So that is one thing he talks about within the e-book and there’s a lot of other ways to do it. And I additionally suppose it actually depends upon you and what works for you. So the entire level is to have mechanisms in place to assist preserve your self on monitor. Some persons are very internally motivated or externally motivated, or possibly they name it intrinsically motivated, I’m unsure. However I’m an individual the place I don’t actually need a whole lot of exterior accountability. I’m very very similar to on the within, if I’ve determined I wanna do one thing that’s it for me, that’s sufficient. I do want methods to maintain myself on monitor. For instance, my husband, he has a pal who he at all times goes to the gymnasium with. It’s not that he by no means goes to the gymnasium by himself, he does, nevertheless it helps him so much to have this pal who he goes with. It’s simply kind of an accountability factor. It simply implies that he is aware of his buddies there. In that case, if he’s not there then he’s type of letting him down or that’s most likely too harsh of a wording, however you realize, one thing alongside these strains. Whereas me, I used to be making an attempt to get again into the gymnasium this yr for my psychological well being causes, and so I used to be contemplating becoming a member of this new gymnasium the place all my buddies go. I went as soon as and it was actually enjoyable to see everybody. It type of dawned on me thatI’m simply not very externally motivated. I’m a really inside, intrinsically motivated particular person, so I truly don’t actually need somebody there. I simply must have it in my thoughts that that is essential to me and I must have purchased into the explanation why, and for me that’s adequate. And as soon as I’ve that, then I simply must type of have my mechanisms to maintain myself on monitor. For me, I’m a bit bit extra of a reward system particular person. I believe you’re like this too, Elsie. I wish to have a bit reward on the finish of a giant objective, like as soon as I obtain it then I’m like, oh, I’m shopping for myself this most likely new jumpsuit or no matter it’s. I’m doing one thing, I’m taking myself out to get my nails completed, no matter. I’m a bit extra of a rewards particular person and I wish to set these for myself. However yeah, you is likely to be an individual who you actually wish to work with others, possibly you want engaged on groups. Perhaps you want an accountability associate for sure objectives. These are nice instruments and if that’s one thing that helps you, you need to do it. However they’re not essentially for me and I don’t actually suppose they’re for you both,Elise. That’s why we thrive a lot at working alone and being alone so much, however I do like reward programs.
Elsie: I like rewards too and for me I believe you’re a pure finisher and I’m not. So for me, I like to seek out one thing to assist me get previous the half the place I failed earlier than, which is normally, relying on what kind of undertaking, it’s normally the center or round like day 10 when issues get boring. The purpose the place issues get boring, the entire novelty is worn off is normally onerous for me to get previous. I’m very into beginning one thing. In my life I’ve most likely began a whole lot of issues that I did for someday, which is admittedly humorous. So, beginning is like my happiest level after which the remainder of it I’ve to maintain myself in some way externally motivated. A rewards system is admittedly good for me. I believe that I don’t wanna depend on different individuals as a result of that’s simply not life like for my life-style. So I believe I just like the little rewards. Additionally, the opposite factor I actually like is charts the place you shade in one thing for both every day or every milestone, nevertheless the chart goes. However I actually just like the coloring in charts are very useful for me as a result of when you get to a sure level, it’s like a bit bit addictive to maintain going and identical to get to that utterly full level. However yeah, I believe that the factor I appreciated from the 12 yr was the half about score your self. I believe it’s a bit bizarre, however I’ve completed it earlier than and I really feel like I’m normally a bit bit harsh. Nevertheless it doesn’t actually matter in case you’re harsh or beneficiant, so long as you’re constant, type of doesn’t matter. It’s only a approach to preserve your self making an attempt to do higher. And I do suppose that having your personal accountability is so a lot better than making an attempt to get another person to carry you accountable. I’ve by no means discovered one other particular person holding me accountable to be as efficient and constant as one thing I might do myself.
Emma: I additionally suppose like I simply have an actual, I don’t know a great way to say this, however I don’t actually care what different individuals suppose that a lot, if I care what you suppose, then I do and if I don’t, I don’t. That’s simply what I’ve at all times been like. And I believe at occasions in my life that served me very well and at different occasions in my life, it’s made it the place I’ve been type of remoted. Nevertheless it’s simply what I’m like. It doesn’t inspire for me as a result of if I’ve determined that’s now not my objective and my accountability associate or no matter was like we’re nonetheless doing this. I’d be like, no, I’m not and I’m identical to not motivated by exterior forces. However on the score factor, I believe it’s a bit bizarre too, however one factor I like about it’s I do suppose it permits extra. I desire a category that’s like, you will get an A or you will get an F and every thing in between. I believe move fail is type of nerve-wracking a bit bit. So I like that in, not less than in my world, and score myself, I can provide myself like a stable B minus and be like, Hey, it’s not so unhealthy, however you could possibly do higher, I like that. So then it feels such as you’re not a failure. You didn’t fail, however you could possibly do some higher. You didn’t get an A and I, I like that as a result of then it’s like, all proper, I’m gonna preserve making an attempt, I’m not gonna quit on this. However I see that there’s some areas the place I can enhance considerably. So I like issues which have a whole lot of scale or a whole lot of grey. I don’t do as properly in like black and white conditions, I suppose. After which actually the very last thing that I wished to speak about with 12 week yr was a check-in, the check-in time, which is week 13, so on the finish of your 12 weeks, it’s time to verify in. So a pair issues to consider with that. Clearly, It’s good to simply take time on the finish of this timeframe or any kind of objective setting factor to see how you probably did to charge your self to simply verify in as a result of I believe a whole lot of occasions, not less than for me, possibly this comes pure for others, however for me, I’m a really ahead transferring particular person. I really feel like I can end one thing and I don’t even actually speak about it, and it doesn’t even actually register and I’ll simply preserve transferring to the subsequent objective. After which I’ll see a pal who I haven’t seen in a pair months and they are often like, Hey, did you end writing that novel you have been engaged on? And I’m like, oh yeah, I did. Yeah, that was enjoyable, I’m engaged on this now. That’s what I’m like generally and I believe it’s cool that you’ve got a whole lot of objectives in life, however you didn’t actually take any time to, one, have a good time when you’ve got success, so do this, don’t make that mistake. Rejoice when you will have successes, as a result of that’s what life ought to be stuffed with is getting higher and higher at objective setting, at no matter it’s that you just’re desirous to do together with your time. So aside from celebrating your successes, I additionally suppose checking in is an effective time, particularly in case you’re new to the 12 week yr to simply type of seeing the way it went. As a result of right here’s the factor, you may get to the top of 12 weeks and understand, wow, I made manner too huge of objectives, so I epically failed didn’t get them completed, and never as a result of I didn’t strive actually onerous however as a result of they have been too huge, they have been an excessive amount of for 12 weeks, and that’s okay, you don’t must really feel unhealthy about that. You simply want to regulate for the subsequent 12 weeks. It’s good to be extra life like and you could possibly additionally get to the top of your 12 weeks and be like, that was type of simple. I used to be type of completed six weeks by and it’s like you could possibly do extra. You can add extra to your 12 week, to your quarter objective record as a result of yours have been too simple and that’s okay too however now it’s time to readjust. So long as you’re taking inventory of how the final quarter went, you’re gonna be capable to higher make objectives for the subsequent 12 weeks. And you can even type of see how did life change? How do you know my objectives change or something like that. I additionally had this second, so this occurred to me in January of this yr I obtained to the top of the month and I used to be feeling actually down as a result of I had been actually sick. I used to be sick for like two stable weeks. I’ve a toddler, so I’m sick lot, simply kind of a part of it. It’s winter, we additionally had some snow days, which was actually enjoyable, nevertheless it type of obtained me off of a few of my objectives of attending to the gymnasium and strolling extra for my psychological well being. However what I did was I used to be feeling actually down after which I type of checked out my to-do record that I sustain on my bulletin board in my workplace and it has all my work stuff and I additionally put my private issues on there, simply because I’ve it multi functional place and it’s larger than a post-it like Elsie was speaking about nevertheless it’s sufficiently small that I can take a look at it and one fast look and so I like that it retains me on monitor and I spotlight it, in order that’s my coloring manner of seeing what I obtained. .And so I used to be it and I noticed that like 90% of it was highlighted. Like I nonetheless obtained so much completed in January, although I felt actually crappy and I used to be actually sick and I had much more days off than I used to be type of planning on as a result of we had snow days. However I noticed like, Hey, truly I’m glad I’m taking this second to take inventory, as a result of truly this month went very well. I obtained so much completed after I had time to work, I actually busted out and after I didn’t get to work as a result of I used to be sick or we had a snow day, I rested or I performed with my son cuz he was residence and that was cool too, that was needed, the resting. Enjoying together with your son’s extra enjoyable than needed, it’s not the phrase I’d use, it’s far more enjoyable than needed. It’s additionally needed, nevertheless it’s not similar.
Elsie: It’s a part of life proper now, for certain.
Emma: The variety of occasions I’ve watched the vehicles films this month is just too many occasions, however love you Lightning McQueen. Anyway, so I believe generally having this check-in time, if nothing else, it will possibly type of pressure you to appreciate that you just did a greater job than possibly you have been considering, or not less than that’s what I discover occurs for me so much is I believe I’ve these grand concepts and I truly get so much completed, nevertheless it doesn’t at all times really feel so nice within the second. So when you will have these occasions the place you let your self verify in, possibly you do want to regulate. Perhaps issues went terribly and you should make some changes, however possibly additionally issues are higher than you suppose and also you’re simply type of onerous on your self, which is what I do.
Elsie: My first month went terribly. Yeah, you do want to regulate.
Emma: That’s okay, that’s effective too. It’s not the top of the world to regulate. Anything? Another ideas you wished to share concerning the 12 week yr?
Elsie: Yeah. I believe while you don’t make your objectives, I’d say I don’t make my objectives like more often than not, and I believe that’s regular, particularly when a whole lot of the objectives are one thing huge that you just’ve by no means completed earlier than otherwise you tend of placing too many on every record. So I believe for the subsequent time, if you’re a objective repeater like me, the place you’re like, I didn’t make that, however I’m gonna strive once more. Then I believe making some kind of edit to attempt to handle the ache level. So for myself, my ache level is normally it’s onerous to get began or it’s onerous to maintain going as soon as it will get boring, that are each totally different nevertheless it’s gonna occur again and again and over for the remainder of my life since you solely get one mind. So I believe discovering little methods to inspire your self previous your ache factors, I believe might be actually good when. You’re most likely gonna have a whole lot of the identical objectives, like again and again all through your years or comparable not less than. So it’s one thing you possibly can undoubtedly get higher at, like tricking your personal mind and placing your self in your very best place for achievement. I believe that no matter it’s a must to do for me, the little rewards are good, the little charts, however do no matter it’s a must to do to provide your self that very best likelihood.
Emma: I believe that ought to be a T-shirt, you solely get one mind.
Elsie: It’s true. There’s so many occasions I examine myself to Emma as a result of Emma is sort of a finisher in any respect prices. She finishes every thing and I don’t end most likely like a tenth of the issues that you just do, however I don’t have an opportunity to dwell life together with your mind. So, it’s prefer it doesn’t actually matter, it’s a whole waste of time mainly to check myself to somebody who has totally different strategies. So the one strategies that I can enhance upon are those that work for me. So yeah, I believe simply discover the issues that inspire you and actually use these strategies.
Emma: Yeah, I do suppose there’s not a whole lot of worth in evaluating your self usually, however evaluating your mind since we’re on that matter to different individuals as a result of it’s such as you’re not gonna be that particular person and doubtless, there’s truly a whole lot of strengths to being your self. There’s tons of issues that I want I used to be like, you extra, however I’m not and I’m not gonna be, so I can simply admire them about you and I’ll simply worth the issues about me. Which I do suppose certainly one of my issues is I do like to complete issues and I like that about myself. There’s different occasions I want I used to be a bit extra of a perfectionist, however I’m not and there’s no likelihood of it. So I simply must know that about myself and simply pressure myself to decelerate. Or redo one thing if it must be redone and be extra trustworthy about that. As a result of I’m simply not a perfectionist and I believe that that’s okay, however it will possibly maintain again my work from being higher than I believe it could possibly be at occasions. So anyway. Yep, we’re who we’re. Settle for it and develop.
Elsie: For certain. I believe you actually must embrace what your pure strengths and weaknesses are, after which use this to get a bit bit extra completed. However I felt prefer it made a giant distinction for me. I really like the possibility to have extra recent begins and yeah, I actually don’t see why beginning a giant objective solely each January, it doesn’t even make sense as a result of January just isn’t even the most effective month. It’s undoubtedly not my prime for like something. And it’s like additionally for individuals like us with little youngsters, it’s such as you’re recovering from the hangover of placing on a magical vacation in your youngsters. Which is so much if your own home so much.
Emma: I believe too, like most individuals I believe, establish with this like the start a part of any undertaking and the objective setting time is admittedly enjoyable. It’s thrilling cuz it’s the dreaming half, such as you’re dreaming of all these stuff you wanna do and so that you get to try this 4 occasions a yr as an alternative of only one time a yr in case you do the 12 week yr. And that’s, I believe, extra enjoyable. It’s 3 times as enjoyable, it’s far more enjoyable. Okay, so I believe that’s about it on that. The subsequent factor I wished to speak about was the excessive 5 check. So if individuals haven’t heard of this possibly simply inform ’em like the way you heard of it, since you despatched it to me, you have been like, take this check, I used to be like, okay. So how did you even hear about it? It’s type of like energy finder, nevertheless it’s not, I don’t know.
Elsie: So a listener requested that we do like energy finder check and I discovered this check simply by Googling free energy finder check. What’s the precise web site?
Emma: It’s excessive 5 check.com.
Elsie: And it was with a quantity 5, excessive quantity 5. check.com. Okay, so we did this, these checks, it’s free. I couldn’t get my husband to do it, however I obtained Emma to do it. So , that was half of a win. It provides you a prime 5 strengths and Emma and I had like a number of of the identical strengths which I used to be not anticipating, however then it did make a whole lot of sense. After which those which might be totally different additionally make a whole lot of sense. So anyway, ought to we learn what our strengths have been? My prime one is Catalyst, my second one is Optimist, my third is Filo Math, which suggests somebody who likes to study. The subsequent one is Thinker, and the final one is timekeeper. This was actually fascinating, I used to be not shocked that I had optimist up actually excessive. I do suppose that’s certainly one of my strengths and my complete key to success of my complete life is like believing you realize, just like the woman from TikTok who says, How onerous can it’s syndrome, I type of have that and I’ve at all times felt that I might do something that I need to do in life. And I believe it’s a manner my mind was born. After which a love of studying I undoubtedly suppose that’s one thing we share. That one’s in your record too, proper? Yeah. F
Emma: Yeah Filo math was my primary.
Elsie: Had been there every other ones that we have been sharing? Thinker? That is sensible too after which timekeeper. This one was fascinating as a result of it stated that I mainly appreciated to race myself, which is true. My solely manner of getting issues completed, it’s nearly like a bit child while you set the timer for them to wash their room, that’s nonetheless how I’m to this present day about any objective. If I’m not on an aggressive deadline, I’m most likely not even engaged on it. In order that’s like my complete methodology.
Emma: I used to be filo math, timekeeper, focus professional, deliverer, and thinker. Focus.
Elsie: Focus Knowledgeable is like the right approach to describe you as a result of I don’t suppose very many individuals would relate with how properly you focus since you identical to don’t get in your telephone. You simply don’t have a distractable mind the way in which that most individuals do.
Emma: Effectively, I don’t know if that’s wholly true. I undoubtedly get on my telephone generally. However Yeah, I do suppose certainly one of my strengths is I can give attention to issues. I at all times chalk it as much as that we needed to sit by so many boring sermons rising up, and I simply obtained actually good at focusing throughout something.
Elsie: We have been educated in highschool, throughout our church years, we have been educated to be be aware takers through the sermons that was like mainly the way in which that you just present that you just’re being well mannered and listening and I do suppose that was an especially good behavior of studying tips on how to get essentially the most out. Sermons are not less than in our church, have been extraordinarily boring. I believe we obtained essentially the most out of it that we might, not less than you possibly can bear in mind, like one thing from what your favourite half was and issues like that.
Emma: Yeah, mine additionally was love of studying.
Elsie: Wait, learn them once more.
Emma: Mainly do filo math, which once more, I don’t know tips on how to pronounce that both. That’s what I’m gonna go together with filo Math, timekeeper, focus professional, deliverer and thinker and I believe deliverer was not in your record.
Elsie: Deliverer, I believe that is why we’re such a great crew collectively as a result of I’ve just like the catalyst and the optimist which might be totally different and you’ve got deliverer and focus professional which might be totally different and I believe that that’s like so much to supply one another.
Emma: Yeah. So I believe you’re like, how onerous can it’s? And I’m like, properly, I suppose we’ll simply end
Elsie: I find it irresistible. Yeah, I hope that a few of you’re taking it. I believe it was extraordinarily correct and fascinating. I’m gonna push my husband once more to take it as a result of I simply wanna perceive that little mind. I want I might push, mine’s a screenshot, so I can’t push on what catalyst means. I want I might learn what it meant, possibly I’ll look it up actual quick. It means you can not wait to start out your undertaking, you begin it immediately, you like beginning. That sounds proper.
Emma: You’re keen on beginning and I really like ending, so we’re an ideal crew. I additionally thought it was humorous. So it type of has 4 totally different energy households and your issues might be in any of those 4 households and the households are considering, doing, feeling, and motivating and all of mine are within the considering and doing. So I’ve no strengths in feeling or motivating, so in order for you somebody who can inspire you, I’m not that particular person. And in order for you somebody who has a whole lot of emotions, I suppose I’m not that particular person both. I don’t know. Clearly I do have a whole lot of emotions, however I don’t know I simply thought that was type of humorous. I do suppose after I’m working or after I’m making an attempt to perform, which doesn’t must be work associated like profession, it could possibly be no matter. I do suppose I’m very, let’s do issues like I’ve an inventory. Even in being a mother, it’s not that I don’t inform Oscar how a lot I really like him or how proud I’m of him, I inform him each single day how proud I’m of him. However I additionally suppose very a lot when it comes to, okay, it’s Saturday, what are we going to do? We’re going to go get a donut. Don suppose that’s what we’re going to do.
Elsie: I don’t suppose that’s what it means although, I don’t suppose it implies that you’re not an emotive particular person.I’ll cease in the course of a undertaking simply to cry and also you don’t do this. You realize what I imply?
Emma: Yeah. I imply, I would actually, however I believe it’s extra of, how do you. I don’t know tips on how to clarify this. How do you want undergo life? As a result of to me, it’s not that I don’t emote or have emotions on issues, I simply don’t suppose when it comes to my emotions so far as like, what am I going to perform this weekend? Or what’s my life about? I don’t actually suppose when it comes to emotions or I consider it extra in what I’m gonna do and achieve. I don’t know, however I believe lots of people do this, so I’m not likely certain. I simply thought it was humorous that each one of mine have been very concentrated. I’d like to satisfy an individual who has one energy in every of the 4 households, and so they’re this like completely balanced particular person, however most likely that’s not likely even the way it works.
Elsie: Yeah, mine has 4 colours.
Emma: Oh, you’re a balanced particular person then.
Elsie: However I don’t really feel balanced both. I don’t really feel extra balanced than you.
Emma: Mine is like all two colours, not one of the different two .
Elsie: Effectively, I’m grateful in your strengths and I believe it’s kind of like Enneagram or something. It’s identical to good to know. So to perceive different individuals higher. So I believe it’s very useful.
Emma: Sure, I like something that helps you perceive your self or the world higher. I don’t actually like issues that put us in containers. I wish to make jokes about being a sure manner or no matter, however to me that’s simply me being a bit bit self-deprecating for enjoyable. I truly don’t actually view it that manner, I believe it’s only a device for self enhance as a result of I don’t have strengths in these different two areas, I can’t be that manner. I don’t truly imagine that. I wish to say a joke about it however that’s not truly my perception.
Elsie: Yeah. No, I don’t both. I simply know I don’t take pleasure in ending, however I nonetheless know that I can, and I believe that that’s simply the one distinction. It’s like, for certain I can do it, you realize?
Emma: Yeah. How onerous can it’s? Prefer it’s onerous, isn’t that what Elwood says? Yeah. I obtained into Harvard, prefer it’s onerous.
Elsie: Yeah. I wanna watch Legally Blonde, let’s do this film.
Emma: Yeah, we must always do this for per week we watch. It’s a great one.
Elsie: Okay, now it’s time for everybody’s favourite, a joker a reality with Nova. Right here’s Nova.
Nova: A joke is, what’s a polar bear within the rain? A drizzly bear?
Elsie: Oh, I like that one. That’s a great joke. Okay, thanks Nova.
Nova: Bye everybody.
Emma: Thanks a lot for listening, we actually, deeply admire all of you and all of the emails that you just ship us each single week. When you wanna help A Lovely Mess listed here are two free methods, I like to simply give these on the ends of episodes. Primary, you could possibly go away us a podcast assessment, it actually does assist us develop. They present up within the Apple areas or wherever you take heed to podcasts, so it means so much and two on our weblog, both a Lovely Mess or Childhood Magic. Anytime you see a recipe, in case you might go away a 5 star assessment, assuming that you just’ve completed it and you realize that it’s good, that is also a manner that helps us develop and helps our blogs develop. So these are simply two free issues you are able to do and we’d admire them. And in case you do neither, that’s okay too. We nonetheless love you and we hope that you’ve got an ideal week.
Elsie: I see all these evaluations although, and I do know that they’re from our podcast, listeners. So thanks a lot.We’ll be again subsequent week with a, you’ve obtained mail rewatch, so if you wish to give your self a bit deal with this week in preparation, there’s your warning.
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